Coffin Flop

Sell your arteries and buy my casket gown/It better be black, it better be tight/It better be just my size

Spectrum is planning to drop 22 channels, including Corncob TV. They're saying by the end of 2022 Corncob TV won't be available on your cable menu. 

That means you won't be able to see some of your favorite Corncob TV shows, including 'Coffin Flop'. 

They're saying they want to drop Corncob TV because we showed over 400 naked dead bodies on our show, 'Coffin Flop'. 

If you love Corncob TV shows it's time to tell Spectrum, "No." 

They're saying, "Coffin Flop's not a show."

"It's just hours and hours of footage of real people falling out of coffins at funerals.”

"There's no explanation. Just body after body busting out of shit wood and hitting pavement."

They're saying "It's impossible that many dead bodies are falling out of coffins every day." 

"And it's impossible that one out of every five of them are nude." 

I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YA, BUD! We're just shooting funerals and showing the ones where the BODIES fly out!

They're saying, "No way. You must've rigged something." I didn't do fucking SHIT. I didn't rig SHIT. I've been waiting a long time for a hit on Corncob TV. I DIDN'T FUCKING DO THIS! 

They're saying we don't have permissions of the family. I said we don't need permissions of the family. We're allowed to show 'em nude 'cause they ain't got no soul! 

The guys at Spectrum think I'm just some dumb hick. They said that to me, at a dinner! 

Call Spectrum and say, "I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT IT! I'M NOT WORRIED ABOUT ANY OF THIS! THERE'S WORSE SHIT ON THE LOCAL NEWS!" This world's fucking so fucked up. And people are mad at me because I showed a bunch of naked dead bodies with their spread blue butts flying out of boxes? Really? I'm done! Do what you want! Pull the plug! I'LL KILL YOU.